What was she like that night? You had built it up so much in your mind… there’s almost no way that date could live up to those expectations. Three years you had waited, just to take care girl you liked out to dinner. And somehow it was perfect. She smiled the whole night. Laughed the whole night. You both had fun the whole night. You didn’t fall into a rut of negativity once the whole night. Even the stuff you agreed on being negative about together. 🤔

You both just… had a nice, fun, enjoyable night together.

And don’t sell yourself short – you know she was a little nervous too. 🙂

With all the buildup she was probably a little worried about meeting some kind of expectations you had.

But that night was just a night of transcendence. You’d been head over heels for her for a while, had so many long, depthful conversations, and you had plenty of reason to find her… enchanting.

But as much as you had spent time with her and all manner of form, it did not prepare you for the magnificent woman you took out to dinner that night.

And as the gentleman it was on you to take her out on the town. Her smile. Placid. Loving. Kind. Just…elegant…

That night… everything was magical. You never in a million years expected to be able to truly identify with Cinderella.

You will never understand why.

Why God gave you what you’d dreamed of – literally – more than once… just… nevermind…

Nevermind why you love her. She has no idea just who she is. And why.

Elegance of her kind actually… changes you when it comes to her. You aren’t you around her, despite your word to her to always be honest. Your sarcasm and prickliness you’ve buried in her presence. And it feels it’s almost as it ought to be.

But why?

Answer’s both cryptic and obvious. Which means only one thing.

Whatevs. You’re statistically past halfway to the grave and you know based on recent trends that… you don’t have as long as most folks think you would.

God’s put you here, and you chose to stay when He would no longer ask you to.

Why?

Because you’re you, she’s her, and God’s God.

If she only knew… what she meant to you, and more importantly… why.

Well…nevermind. It’s likely for the best. Treasure the memory of that night. Treasure every moment with her. Every memory.

And hope… Pray… Beg… for her to find happiness. True happiness.

By her own admission, she battles daily with her own ego. If only she could see herself the way you see her. Maybe… just maybe… she could understand.

Was it all an act that night? Nope. 😊

And the fact that it wasn’t speaks volumes to you.

Now, sleep. One more sleep-apnea-fueled battle against death with a stuffy nose for 8 more hours. Maybe you’ve served your purpose in life, and it’s time to go home. Maybe not.

All you know is… you will never be the same after that wonderful night…

…no matter what.