Breaking rules, June 24

I don’t understand. But you don’t want to talk about it. All good. Neither of us enjoys hearing about the others dating life. 🤔

I’m here for you as a friend. We are not right for each other as more, at least right now, and we both know it. The future is unwritten and anything is possible, but right now I am only meant to be in your life as what I am. That could change in the future for good or ill, but right now I’m just Orson.

We both know there’s more to it than that than that. All I meant today was that the current situation your face, whatever it is, involves dealing with him and whatever issues have come about.

Whatever frustrations you’ve had this week would exist, even if I didn’t. That is literally all I meant.

Sweetie, it’s very possible that the days to come are going to be very difficult, and things will likely get worse before they get better, based on what little I have been able to infer.

You said today that you didn’t want to be “an immature fuckup” (your words) to my life, etc. and well, yeah… if you feel that way, I can appreciate it. I wouldn’t want to be a problem for anyone either. 🤔

But sweetie, not for my sake or anyone else’s…for yours – if you don’t think you’re good enough for “better”, then… “be better”.

You have overcome plenty of things in the past, and you can overcome anything you choose to. You’re 40 now. You have had half a lifetime of experiences to see where your choices can lead you.

You are better than the situation you are in now and who you’re with now. If you’re able to channel your pride into determination to live a better life and make the choices you need to to see it through, absolutely nothing is going to stop you. 😊

In the last few months I have stepped back a bit emotionally for both our sakes. Don’t mistake that for lack of care.

Now is the time for you to think about your life and where you really want to go. You are truly free to go where you want and live where you want. None of us are pinned down by anything save what we choose to prioritize.

As for me, I want you to be happy. I have no expectations for myself of you as we each are now other than friendship. Even if we were meant to be, it’s not right now, and both of us need to work on ourselves so that we are ready for whoever comes down our respective roads.

So if that’s bothering you, don’t let it. There’s no reason as far as I know why we need to be upset. If I’m wrong, just come to me about it. You know I have no intention of hurting you intentionally.

If you haven’t been happy since 1984… that’s a long time to be out in the cold. And I’m sorry, but it’s not going to change today.

But you sure can begin to change tomorrow. 👊😊

Make up your mind to be more. To be better. To have higher standards for those around you. Turn your weaknesses into strengths. Stretch yourself into being more. Especially when you don’t want to.

It’s so easy to be black and white in Pleasantville. Doing what we’ve always done, getting what we’ve always got.

So be more. 😊

I might be naïve, ignorant, or have one of a million other faults… but I have faith in you. Why? Because I’m right to.

You. Got. This. 👊😊