Dschinghis Khan’s “Moskau”was lumped in with “Rasputin” in YouTube algorithms. That must have been how it happened back in 2018. Thanks to an absurd late 80s song by a Slovenian band and a taste in music that’s literally inexplicable, searching for “Moskau” mixes led to a song by a German band whose lead singer was clearly an older Justin Trudeau from an alternate dimension, and a slight period in your life where you were gravitating to love songs.
German isn’t a beautiful sounding language, but there was something so lovely about this music; the music itself was unique in bombastic tenderness in a way you couldn’t explain with any other combination of words, and the words – whatever they were – sung with undeniable talent… whatever… it’s okay to like odd things. 😂
The discovery coincided with you taking charge of inventory work at the place you were at, which meant that they mentally merged., as “at the time” things always do.
Two of the techs come in one day and hear. Paused, and asked “Is this German?” Without missing a beat, you deadpanned… “Well yeah; doing inventory, so German love songs of the early 90’s” with a completely straight face as if he ought to know the music schedule.
They didn’t know if you were joking, and TBH, you didn’t either. Either way gives a laugh, and you’ve long since passed the threshold to care what others thought about things you like. That tech thought you were weird though. Probably doesn’t miss working with you. They couldn’t tell when you were joking thanks to the deadpan humor. A few of them finally figured out that if they couldn’t tell, it didn’t matter, and when it wasn’t time for joking, you weren’t.
Several Flippers songs were named for women, likely past lives of the singers. Two of them must have dated separate women both named Angelina, because they have two completely different songs, each named “Angelina”.
One’s better
Or maybe two of them had a thing with the same woman and each got a song out of it. lol who knows. There’s got to be a few funny stories behind that. Literally who knows.
If there’s anything that irks you on these trips, it’s when the on-site guys pull the speakers out and blare standard fare classic rock as as if they had to prove they were so freaking normal to each other.
Union guys in Pennsylvania… swandagoodness they loved their AC/DC and you’ve heard “Thunderstruck” enough now. They honestly seemed to come off the assembly line themselves. Music taste. Overall demeanor. Personality.
Nah, that’s not being fair. They eventually mellowed out once they realized you were there to help them blast thru their deadlines and leave. You weren’t trying to take their jerbs. You wanted them to freaking keep them and look smart for bringing you on board. Meh. Yankees.
You wanted to jam Malaika while cutting shelves so loud they’d never get the earworm out.😂 Passive aggressive isn’t you though. Never has been. Active aggressive is more fun. Smile. Eye contact. Nothing subtle. Yes, I’m doing this on purpose. Turn your crap down or you’re getting both Angelinas.😂
Your own crew last time were talking Migos; rapper that sang “Bad and Boujee” and it was almost like a need for ‘badass approved’ music. They wouldn’t figure out where they wanted to eat and the clock was ticking while you were driving. Like Clark Griswold, you said you needed consensus or the music would hurt. No consensus. Okay. Anna May Remix of y’all’s beloved guy until we have a solution. With singing along.
So, Culver’s was fine. 😂 And the team leader was laughing and singing along too. Your crews are so much more fun than the locals. Pennsylvania hardhat hive mind wouldn’t have survived.😂
Grrr…something has you salty this trip. North Dakota’s alright. Been in colder, but not to work. Even further from the Sea than Nebraska, so this is the new “peak inland” spot.
Worried? Maybe. Arms still haven’t fully recovered. Lots on the horizon to be concerned about. Things you’d be far more riled up about if you had kids to worry about. Understandings of what’s coming down the pipe economically and geopolitically.
The utter lack of seriousness and wisdom of populations across the West, not just America. Prevalence of Non-survival-based values. Geopolitical train wrecks coming, and generations of strong men have created the world we’re about to enter. 20-year old boys are starting to wonder if they’re going to be sent into a war by girls who voted the way Taylor Swift told them to, etc. Most likely not, but the divide between people having to deal with the consequences of those who have no idea what consequences are will be the theme of the year at some point; we are a species that apparently just has to learn the hard way.
Lol like you yourself aren’t just as bad. No one’s immune.😂
Freshwater Lake Michigan looms below. Closing in on O’Hare. Brief connection to Fargo. Then it’s rural North Dakota. Hours to get to hotel. 65 minutes across overly straight roads to the site every day.
You won’t be driving. So no threatening the crew with music scarring if they burn clock trying to decide where to have lunch.😔 Bring the Bible. Lots of time to read all about Romans.
Will need to read Isaiah again. It’s not that you missed something, it’s that there are so many different things going on. Written that way.
Meantime, you’d been wondering, and signs have been mounting. Romans is easier. That’s the whole point of it right now.
Lots of little reminders. Subtle, for months. Not like Isaiah where you were going to Revelation and asked if He wanted you to go somewhere else and…well, you got an answer. That was odd. Definitely mixed things up with regards to how you thought you communicated with Him. It was pretty straight to the point, though, so hey, no complaints.
Romans verses here and there, lots of people talking about that Empire. Maybe even a trailer for a movie? Nah, that’s just your mind making connections. It’s important to remember that sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. So when it’s Him, you know. You’re strong here – but tend to your strengths too, so they don’t become blind spots.
Second leg of the trip home, the Bible on the plane thinking Romans 1, and before you get it open the woman next to you says…
“For I am not ashamed of the gospel,because it is the power of God that brings salvation to everyone who believes: first to the Jew, then to the Gentile.”
She thought it was nice that you weren’t ashamed to read the Bible on the plane. And, naturally it was Roman’s 1:16.
Brief conversation to explain your giggling, thank her for letting Him tap you on the shoulder through her joy, and you started reading.
Oh yeah, it was easier. And Chapter 5 by the Fireplace tonight to use up some more wood since you didn’t realize you would be heading out so soon.
Glad you got the chance to meet up with the new group again. 10-15 people at a nearby house to have fascinating discussions of faith. Not just a Bible study… Really. Smart. People. Three college professors. Two biochemists. Doctors. You loved it. Got to be the guy just listening and the “simple” guy.
One topic was longevity tech; how it’ll be possible to live to 150 with vitality. You were one of the voices that said they could keep it.
You wanted out of the crib when He decided you were ready; to go Home. The future of a world run by man and AI sounds worse every day, especially since the next is run by Him…
The fact that they were all about great food, high-end bourbon and fine cigars; yeah, hog Heaven 😂 So glad you were here. Next ones in December; hopefully you’ll be back.
Met a few ‘someones’ there. Who knows. Focus on the wisdom first, then the social stuff. And you did, so it was fine. 😂
North Dakota in November is going to be a chore, especially given the levels of soreness that actually now qualify as minor injuries from repeated reciprocating, saw and shears cutting through that metal.
If it’s going to be like cutting metal was in Nebraska, you’re going to take charge on research and put together something for everyone to protect their arms. No one is used to doing this stuff at these angles, and vibration injuries look serious, IE potentially long-term if you aren’t careful. Microfractures to muscles where they attach to bone.Just reading about it hurt.
Wouldn’t have been as bad, but you chose to take the harder machines so the younger guys could use the better ones. Turns out the ones you started with just sucked, and the other ones were better. By the time you figured it out, you were used to them, so, hey…
It’s been over a week and your fingers are still swollen. Steroid injection and doc visit helped. You needed this second week home also. Folks need you. Dad’s shoulder now going. They can’t really move furniture; not that that’ll stop them.
As much pain as your arms were in, they’d warn you something was heavy, and it really, really wasn’t.
Far more difficult times are coming down the pipe. These are some of the good old days. Money doing well, lots of work on the horizon, you’re in good health, the folks are still walking, Ted still runs around the house on occasion, and the economy hasn’t collapsed yet.
Never too early to prepare, though.
Reading by firelight; so much peace…
*****
1 Therefore, since we have been made right in God’s sight by faith, we have peace with God because of what Jesus Christ our Lord has done for us.
2 Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of undeserved privilege where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God’s glory.
3 We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance.
4 And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.
5 And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.
Romans 5:1-5 NLT
*****
There is so much love in the world you live in. Reflect it like the moon reflects sunlight as best you can.
Even when it does get worse, there will always be a dawn.
If and when time takes away your loved ones, your health, money, eventually your home and probably your memory… you will be wealthy beyond comprehension in the Holy Spirit.
Almost to the halfway point of week 2 and they want your team for another one.
Another gig also on the horizon. There might be more things going on till Thanksgiving. They already asked if you could do a fourth week. It’d be better to head home for a short bit and come back out. If Ted could be home, it’d be fine. Dad’s happy to run the store, and you’re considering it.
Cutting sheet metal is hard. Shears, saws, and a dozen muscles you never use, even when lifting. The customer’s management has said if they reach a certain point by Thanksgiving, all of them will get a $1K bonus. Not you or your squad… but all of you want to come to bat to get them paid extra. That’s the quality of workers you have. ‘Can-do’ attitude all the way. It’s infectious. Gives you reserves of energy you didn’t know you had. And your’e way ahead of schedule now. So the sheet metal might take a backseat and deploy those new units might be stepped up. That does scare you a bit. They’re 45 lbs; never fire-brigaded hundreds of units that heavy before.
Bible says not to worry though. Tomorrow will take care of itself.
Eating a lot of spiraled ham and canned pineapple. Two ingredients. Pineapple and pineapple juice. Nothing else. Not sure where this craving for pineapples has come from in the last few months. You’ve always loved pears the most. Now you can’t get enough pineapple. Good snack.
Praying a lot lately. Finished Isaiah, but feel a cold elliptical orbit around the Son again. Not sure where to go next. Thinking you might need to read it again, focus more with that study guide you found towards the end.
There isn’t too much more time before November. Try your hardest to enjoy every day.
This short period of time you have a feeling is going to end up being one of the more happy times of your life, but not one you remember a lot of details on. Mom & Dad are still alright. Money’s doing well. The ebb and flow of the various gigs is in a ‘paying off’ phase. You have three favorite college football teams, and all are in the top 10. That happened once before recently and it lasted a week.😂
Need to get closer to Him, as always. He is the source of all your blessings, and you really need to remember that. May the orbit warm up a bit. Maybe read a shorter book to get through the time waiting and then reread Isaiah. Maybe Romans. Someone said he read Romans once a day for 30 days. Wow. Guess that means nothing’s stopping you from reading it once.😂
Miss Ted. Cuddly ball of love. She’s being well taken care of; as much as she can be since she needs her meds 2/day.
Tomorrow will be hot. Hydration, hydration, hydration. You have the safety topic tomorrow. Last time you told the guys to stretch well; muscles will last a lot longer. Someone said “awareness”.
Eh, you’ll think of something.
Sleep is coming up fast. Insomnia isn’t a problem out here after how hard you work.
You’ll miss these days one day. So grateful that you realize it, and that they’ll be even brighter after you’re done with Romans 1.😂
I, I need some young blood Come Friday night Bring on the big flood Like September’s coming on Summer won’t be back for long
Hey, let’s start a big fire Let’s shake it up Let’s try to burn brighter There’s no one here to catch our fall No one here to hear us call
Tonight, this dirty September night We’re stuck out here You’re caught in the starlight Running through these empty streets This city’s built for you and me Running through these empty streets This city’s built for you and me
I, I know that the road’s long It lingers on And Lord knows it’s uphill Seems like you’re not getting anywhere You give up just before you’re there Seems like you’re not getting anywhere You give up just before you’re there
Hey, don’t lose your spirit Feel all alone But it’s there if you need it Seems like you’re not getting anywhere But don’t give up you’re almost there Seems like you’re not getting anywhere But don’t give up you’re almost there
**********
Something’s wrong tonight.
Well, somewhere.
Maybe it’s here. Thank goodness you’re neurotic about saying a blessing before eating anything, even a snack, because it’s been FAR TOO LONG since you had a great convo with Him.
And why not? No particular reason. Deep down, you feel like you’re in the clubhouse, and you don’t need Him on the day-to-day.
Dad’s dad was an alcoholic, wifebeating son of a bitch. Dad to this day is terrified of you drinking, but in a fine twist of irony, sometimes it takes wrecking your inhibitions to realize just how cold it’s gottenspiritually.
So what? Spoiled ass you hits Con, literally hangs out with the homeless, listens to them, talks to them, and gives out a hundred bucks if they promise to read Proverbs and you act like you get to take the rest of the month off? You do that every year. Not necessarily Proverbs, but every year it’s a “therefore by the grace of God” tour for you, and you pray with people you’ll never meet again and hope against logic you made a dent somewhere.
Why do you take ANY time off? Away from your Savior? From the Creator of the Heavens, the Earth, and College fing Football?
Why? Why does hitting the Whiskey draw you closer to Him?
Better question, given how inhibition works…
What the fun is wrong with you?
Why do you HAVE SO MUCH BABBLING FOR THE HOLY SPIRIT AND YOU DON’T WALK THE WALK?
Isaiah has been a train wreck.
Face it. You’re going to have to start over. AGAIN. Because you’re sick of stories of Bronze Age desert kingdoms. Forests. Trees. SEAS, for fun’s sake.
You haven’t absorbed anything from this book. That’s why you haven’t gotten instructions on where to go next. Oh yeah… you’ve pretended. Ezekiel. Acts. Romans. Trying to act like like you felt what you felt when you heard those whispers when you asked Him what He wanted you to read, and if not, you’d just head to Revelation.
You aren’t going to be able to absorb ANYTHING of Isaiah tonight. But that will not stop you.
Because even if you don’t understand… ENOUGH OF THIS ALBATROSS.
If you can’t figure it out? Whatever. So be it. Read it with Jim Beam Vanilla as a buddy. But NEVER as a bro.
Alcohol is NEVER a bro, and you ought to be ashamed of yourself that it often leads you back to where you need to be – in the arms of the Holy Spirit.
Thank God something does, but what does it mean when you have to have inhibition to, etc?
Fuck it. Fun it you mean. Whatever. Stop lying to yourself. Finishing Isaiah tonight. For the first time. And when you’re done? Isaiah sounds awesome.
He led you to it. You heard what you heard. You know what you know. And whatever is interfering with your own Spirit on this dirty September night can go screw itself.
The Word of God is sacred and holy. Quit funning acting like it’s a hobby. You have seen with your own eyes things no one else would believe, and you’ve started acting like the Savior of All is a freaking interesting Sunday morning watching YouTube.
You aren’t you.
Fix it.
And pray to yeet whatever hibitions need to be yeeted.
Maybe it’s because when you drink, it’s because you need Him more. Whatever. This is not healthy, physically, mentally, or spiritually; no matter how amazing you can spell while inebriated.
You going to pray for the Spirit of your dad’s dad? Nope. Because the dead are simply that. Dead.
They had their chance, and they chose Death over Life. Like the Crib of as all there was, instead of getting through their heads that it was a choice between the Light and the dark, and shade is accepting darkness into the soul and acting like it’s okay because we know better than the Light of Creation itself.
Grade A Arrogance – but you dare yourself to act like you’re better when you haven’t said a non-blessing prayer in…too long.
Enough. 3:04am. Store has been pumping out 20 books worth of sales a day and things are going amazing in so much of your life.
And here you are babbling in an online diary instead of finishing Isaiah for the first (prolly of many) times?
Hey. Don’t lose your Spirit. Feel alone…but it’s there if you need it….
Seems like you’re not getting anywhere… but don’t give up – you’re almost there…
Seems like you’re not getting anywhere… but don’t give up – you’re almost there…
Bars aren’t really your thing anymore. You get your year’s worth of partying at Con. But hey, someone wants to get decked out and hit downtown. Never something you say no to, lolz…
Many years of it. Never gets old. Walking down the same streets men with muskets once marched, and many a glass raised.
Good times, bad times, a hundred years pass, and still people love those old streets.
The young. The old. The happy. The sad. Been a long time since you hit the scene down there. Eh, it’ll be fun to get out like old times though. In a suit with a palmetto flag tie; lolz….
These are STILL the Good Old Days.
Enjoy them, and give thanks to Him you get to have more. 🙂
It’s Not a Frame of Mind 