Nice stormy night. Love it when the wind blows strong and the trees dance to its music. Good time to do our hour.

15 “I do not call you servants anymore, because a servant doesn’t know what his master is doing. I have called you friends, because I have made known to you everything I have heard from my Father.”

Good old Jesus. Never really understood the interactive relationship between God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. Then again entire books of speculation are written about that. The Trinity is one of those concepts that doesn’t fit snuggly into human comprehension; it isn’t exactly something someone would come up with if they were making up a religion.

Nor is the idea of going up and standing in opposition to so many aspects of basic human behavior. We love sex and violence, and western civilization prior to Christ generally followed the ancient Greek ideal that might makes right. Covetousness, lying, stealing, etc are all in our nature. Young children even have to be taught not to do them.

Beautiful bolt of lightning. Nice. Being in the garage with the door open is nice tonight, despite Bill and Ted’s complaints.

It’s funny that Your way almost across the board goes against almost every instinct we have, and yet when we follow and hold true to it, all else equal it leads to happiness, success, and bringing light into the world. That’s all over the book of Proverbs.

Between self-control, delayed gratification, being conscientious of the future and following Your word, The only problems we have seem to stem from others not doing that stuff.

Living frugally, working hard, and making good decisions has let the folks get to where they are now. Considering they both grew up dirt poor and barely made ends meet even after they got married, That’s pretty much the way to go. An amazing example I could never live up to. So I don’t have what they have. And I never really will because it’s not mine. It’s yours. Every blessing I have from you. Every dollar I earn, every moment of good health.

Had viral encephalitis hit a few millimeters differently in 1992 I would be a paraplegic. Or dead.

it’s important to take stock of all the things I have to be grateful for from time to time, especially if I’ve been complaining a lot about a few things that I’m not happy with.

Like seriously let’s pull out the ledger and run the numbers of how much I get to complain.

Did the gym earlier tonight. Did a light night. 500 cal cardio, no weights. In and out. Might try going more often and having light nights in between heavy nights.

Friday nights are definitely gym nights. At least they’re not getting worse. I wouldn’t mind chatting with some of the people there, but everyone seems to be in their own headphone world. All the women are on alert for guys talking to them, which makes total sense.

Face it. I just got spoiled. Tonight makes it three months. Almost as long as the amount of time she was here. Feels three times as long. She never seemed to have an grasp of just how happy she made me being here.

Why couldn’t she have just left it off with the email asking for no further contact? Why did it have to get vicious? Yeah, I know. At least that part I’ve encountered enough in the past to know why.

She’s still deep in the subconscious; I fell asleep on the couch last night for a while and the dreams weren’t far behind. Forgot what they were quickly enough, but it is what it is and this too shall pass.

Mind drifts off so easily when I think about her. Need to work on that. John 15:15.

Friends with Jesus. Jesus who went back to heaven and left the Holy Spirit behind. Always pictured the Holy Spirit as the one I can just talk to. Nice to come across the first that gives that a little reinforcement even if it’s Jesus I’m talking to. I don’t know; what are you looking at me for? Lolz

18 “If the world hates you, understand that it hated me before it hated you.”

Definitely feel this sometimes. Not enough to complain about living in this country at least. Not a lot of people take cheap pot shots at followers of Islam or Hinduism; sadly most of the ones who do claim to follow Christ.

I’ve never understood how people can be so angry at Christianity or Judaism for that matter. There’s so much goodness and giving, so many threads of our civilization we take for granted come from it. It’s really easy to grab a hold of some thing here or there and just rip it to pieces. Usually if it’s in the Bible it’s either missing the point or taken out of context.

Folks love their stumbling blocks though. I guess I can’t blame them to an extent; It’s natural to go after the things you disagree with rather than taking the time to gain the underlying foundations faith is built on first. Patience is a virtue. Our increasingly short attention spans make that really tough.

Not sure who the Counselor is in verse 26. Guess He’s talking about the Holy Spirit. Marked it to ask a question later.

Can’t help but find it interesting that I’m actually wanting faster change in my life. That might be a first, lolz. Well since I was a kid and wanted to be an adult because I had no idea what it was like to have to pay bills. 🤔

A lot’s going to be happening soon. Some of it might be good and some might be bad. The last three months have been an eternity.

Please help me keep my eyes on You. I’m getting your signals on Health. Just waiting to figure out a direction to go in, and to have a little extra money. I still have so much to pay down. Nothing I can’t handle though; knew summer was going to be tight. Grateful for a catastrophe safety net; tithing as much as I can each week.

Summer doldrums. But you can’t put a price on a warm, stormy night. The feeling of knowing you are slowly moving forward. Be patient. Most of the weight loss plateau is because your arms and legs are getting more muscular. Be conscientious.

I am getting closer to You. I ask for more focus. I’m smart enough to never pray for more patience. Oh that hurt… 😂

But yeah, I need more focus. maybe a nightly regimen or something. The hour a night is good but it’s being harder to stick to then I thought, mainly because my mind wonders. I don’t know.

Well now the storm has passed and it’s just light rain and crickets. And a couple of whining cats that went out here lolz

No idea where I’m going and I’m stumbling every day, but I’m so grateful for every Blessing. And I do feel things slowly moving in my life. Though I have no idea to what end. And I’m trying not going to leap ahead this time while seeing everything fall into place so perfectly.

That’s why you wanted me to read the book of Ezra. I get it now. I think a part of me always did. I guess it’s my job to make sure I never have to learn that lesson again. I could use some help with that too; still fundamentally an optimist. 😂

Thanks for everything, Lord.

And especially thanks for the cats.

Trying to. Not going anywhere. An hour a day is a good start. Though even the Garden of Eden before the serpent had a complaint.

OK good, you’re excited about burning 1000 cal a night at the gym. You don’t need to push past 1100 yet. Don’t wait till the end to do the weights either.

Stay off the couch at night. Move furniture around if you need to. But sit in the stupid recliner so you don’t doze off. You sleep light, Hurt your throat, remember your dreams, and aren’t much good the next day.

Sick of it. The longer she’s in your thoughts, the more you remember how she left your life instead of all of the love and joy she brought into your life. The only thing you have control of now is how you remember her, and you don’t want anger to be a part of it. You’re doing better each day but your subconscious needs to cut it out.

You say you want God to lead you. Good to hear. What does that mean? Try to be a decent person during the week and make Church on Sunday? Read a chapter in John when you remember to? Sure, talk to Him here and there. Good job, genius.

Do what you’ve always done, get what you’ve always got.

Until you have any better ideas, One hour a day with Him. Not chatting while you’re doing something else and getting distracted. Read. Listen. Pray. The deep kind on your knees with your eyes closed if that’s what it takes.

You want genuine, real, positive change in your life. Something to push you forward. For a while you had that – someone who was strong where you were weak – but you don’t anymore.

Redevelop your focus. If you want to listen to hymns while you’re on the treadmill, that’s fine. Bible videos maybe not because it’s easy for the mind to wander. Figure it out. One hour each day. Don’t care what.

Transformative positive change isn’t changing your frame of mind; it’s changing your state of being. You know very well there is only one way to do that, and that is to Seek Wisdom.

Dad‘s surgery scheduled for July. mentally he’s already in planning mode just in case. Lawyers. Financial planning. Wanted your opinion on some things for after. Told him to do whatever. If you got more than you needed, it was going to charity. He said he was glad to hear that and asked what charities. He just loves planning so he wanted to put them in there. Maybe it was a test. Who knows.

You wanted three. They’ve already got the first one – local food bank – on their list. You know the animal society, and trust them. You were thinking about habitat, but heard some things and want to do more research. If not you’ll find something else. The third will be a faith-based crisis pregnancy center. If habitat doesn’t pan out maybe the second will be an adoption agency.

The next few years are going to be a roller coaster. Well, another one. Don’t sell yourself short; you’re making a lot of positive progress and things are going to take time. You’re doing the things you need to be ready when certain times come.

You’re finally starting to feel warm with God again from time to time. You know that’s the only way to get what you want to go.

So get closer to God. Every day let Him lead you. Get a new hobby. Something fast. Look at paramotoring. You’re close enough to middle-age to go ahead and have your crisis. 😂

Now wind down and get some rest. Have some positive momentum going into Friday night. God knows how much you loathe them.

But end on a good note. 1100 calories. 😃

Dream better. Whenever you can get to sleep that is.

Whatever aching you has passed. Friday was good. Almost a nine hour solid day of catching up at work. Another thousand calorie day at the gym. Getting a good sleep before church tomorrow.

Had a good day today with the folks. Took them to see Top Gun. First time you’ve been in a movie theater in five years. Great movie; worth the wait.

The dream is the one thing that still eludes you. Won’t forever. Let God lead you.

Be grateful for all you have learned. Get closer to Him. Have fun tomorrow.

Insomnia is a bitter foe. You’ll win eventually tonight. Hopefully 🤔

You kinda had a feeling it would be.

Last week was really good. Huge success at the gym. On track with reading the Bible with Lady, accompanied a lot at work and got a nice bonus.

You’re pretty sure you’ve come down with something. Just a sore throat and so little energy. Just enough to drain you and keep you from work and the gym. You fought through it enough to get the basics handled at work each day, but recognize that it’s probably the usual monkey wrench thrown at you the second you develop positive habits.

The dreams continue. You had to say goodbye twice. Having to say it over and over in dreams is becoming tiresome, all part of a rough week though. Nothing you can’t eventually get over. You’re a lot more mature than you were the last time your heart got hurt this way.

You’re far more irritated about where to go from here than the past. Things always fall apart just when you think you’ve met someone great. Nothing much you can do but realize you’re not going anywhere successfully without God leading the way. The last possibility suggested reading the book of John together. Well she’s not interested anymore so you’ll just read it yourself.

When you are right with God, He will open the next door. So get well, then get back to work. Back to the gym. And consider the latest hurtle leapt over.

Next week will be better. 🙂

Just so tired.

Took a while. Won’t take us long next time. 😃

Pedestrian accomplishment. But you’re only a month in, so focus on the accomplishment part lolz

Will read some more John tonight too. Looks like Lady is probably not going to happen, but she gave you a good direction to go in for the next part of the Bible to read. Just hope it’s Better than Ezra. You’re not going to not make that joke. 😂

Be grateful for each small victory. He is guiding you if you let Him. So let Him. He knows the way better anyway. 🤔

Wind me up
Put me down
Start me off and watch me go
I’ll be runnin’ circles around you sooner than you know

For just a moment. Athletic again. Progress. Potential Breakthroughs on many fronts. 😊

Physical and diet paying off. Frustrating Plateau at first 10 lbs finally hit 11, but performance improvement means it’s paying off on muscle. Only time and shoes that don’t blister your feet are keeping you from 1000 calories an hour. Jefferson Curls really hurt, but deadlifts are okay and you could go up on weight on arm day Thursday.

There is a plan at work. Lol you even have a grasp of what it is. Sure isn’t easy given the vast golf between regular and generic Adderall but thank God – you may have finally found a way to make that difference up too.

Weekend was disappointing. You are not doing YouTube church anymore so be there at 9:15. That wisdom is more important than literally anything else.

The folks are getting weaker each day and that means you need to Focus on becoming sound. It’s gonna be time to take care of them soon. Spinal surgery for dad or he’s done walking within two years.

Keep pushing yourself – but you have also got to put God first. Every. Single. Day. He’s always been the source of your joy. Returning to that source is how you’ll find more in the areas of life you want to see improvement.🕊

The mountains, the sea, and everything in between. Wide open planes in the east, trees almost everywhere else.

Passionate, kind, and hardworking people with an independent spirit.

Economically outgoing; thriving as a gregarious prosperity brings new faces from the world over everyday.

Vibrant urban atmospheres; charming, calm towns; and quiet out of the way homes with miles of trees in between.

Here there is so much life. So much excitement. So much possibility.

A truly complex past, and a truly vibrant future.

So much warmth. Sometimes too much. But the sea breeze brings the cool in the Lowcountry as more crisp mountain air from the Appalachians cools the upstate.

Other milestone dates for South Carolina are many. Her birthday was January 24, 1712. Her first day of independence was March 26, 1776. And air conditioning was invented in 1902. 😂

Happy Statehood day, South Carolina.

Best state ever. Best place ever. So blessed to call it home.

Seek Wisdom. Always seek Wisdom.